By Ralph Greco, Jr.
With AI on the rise, we all need to be ever more vigilant on what is coming from a real source and what could be manufactured by inputting some information and a few clicks of a mouse. But great vintage rock, made by the actual hands, mouths, brains, and desires of real men and women (even when manipulating some studio machine) will always rise above the chafe of the manufactured.
And so will the fans.
With that said, here’s 10 ways to recognize a fake vintage rock fan:
1) They think that Jethro Tull is Ian Anderson’s name.
2) They mispronounce Lynyrd Skynyrd.
3) They think Peter Gabriel came on the rock scene with “Sledgehammer,” never knowing he fronted Genesis, and they never knew Phil Collins, “plays drums, too?”
4) Their concert T’s reveal not one tear, stain, or rip and sport Target tags.
5) They like the tribute band more than the actual band.
6) Any vinyl record they own produces no pops or skips when it’s played and the needle on their new turntable doesn’t simply fly across its smoothed-out grooves.
7) They first heard “Smoke On The Water” on Rock Band.
8) They have amassed a personal list of candidates to the Rock and Roll Hall Of Fame that can as much be nominated as inducted.
9) They went to one of Elton John’s last shows hoping mostly to hear his Disney movie hits.
10) Not only can’t they name each Beatle; they have no clue who George Martin is…
